Monkey see, monkey do

Good morning Staker! Here’s what’s cookin’ today. What’s going on with gold prices, why not give a bone broth cocktail a try, how laughing at yourself is good for you, and what daters can learn from the great white whale 🐳

Let’s get into it!

Typically speaking, gold is a safe haven for investors during a crisis. Yet, since war broke out in Iran over the weekend, gold has been volatile at best and in decline at worst.

Here’s what’s happening. When the supply of oil is called into question and demand rises, it causes the U.S. dollar to soar, since the price of oil is measured in U.S. dollars. When the U.S. dollar rises, the price of gold goes down — which is what has mostly been happening this week.

On top of that, gold’s surge over the last year has been largely driven by uncertainty surrounding the long-term strength of the American economy, as tariffs have hamstrung the country’s reputation as a beacon of free enterprise.

“One of the issues with gold right now is it had such a run recently and the speculation has reached a fever pitch,” said Colin White, CEO of Verecan Capital Management. “It’s more fragile right now at this moment in time.”

If there’s uncertainty and, therefore, a lack of confidence in commodities like gold and oil, the safe haven ends up being the U.S. dollar, which is what’s been driving its value in recent days and, in turn, depressing the value of gold.

Yep, that’s right. Even alcohol has now pierced the wellness threshold, and it’s doing so via the strange actions of the few who’ve decided to start making cocktails with bone broth for a hit of protein.

Has protein maxing gotten out of hand, or are the social media influencers wading into this uncharted territory onto something?

Well, it turns out this isn’t actually uncharted territory, and real ones have been experimenting with these types of cocktails for quite some time.

“The bone broth actually gives the drink a much richer, savory taste with a natural source of umami flavor,” says Braithe Gill, the current manager of Brennan’s in New Orleans, which has been putting beef broth in Bloody Marys for over 75 years. On the bayou, they call it a Bloody Bull.

Up in Motor City, the Caucus Cafe has been making the Bullshot for just as long. It’s comprised of a mix of vodka and beef broth. A newer version of the concoction uses gin and beef consommé.

The savory-flavored cocktail may sound a little strange, but it’s quietly been a hit for decades. And these days, if you’re looking to take a little bit of guilt out of your Friday night indulgences, there’s nothing a shot of the good stuff and ten grams of protein can’t handle.

It’s possible that when a baby falls and cries, the tears are due more to the reaction of caregivers than to actual pain. Embarrassment isn’t really part of the equation, but in adulthood, when we trip over something on the sidewalk or break wind in public and get caught, the blushing that follows is usually due to embarrassment.

A study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology involving 3,000 participants suggests instead of being embarrassed, we should try laughing it off.

The researchers tested the reactions of observers when a person stumbled into an awkward or typically embarrassing moment, and those who laughed or shrugged it off were ranked by observers as having more warmth, competence, morality, and authenticity.

“Owning your mistake and laughing first can completely shift the room—you move from being judged to being relatable,” says study co-author Övül Sezer, an assistant professor at the Cornell University SC Johnson School of Business.

Everyone falls down, so what do you have to be embarrassed about? Humility is admirable and even enviable, and when people see that side of you, it can rid the situation of undue judgement and introduce joy to an otherwise awkward moment.

If you want to know what 25,000 daily visitors does to the climate of a chapel, look no further than the Sistine Chapel and the film-like layer of salt the Vatican is currently cleaning off Michelangelo’s depiction of The Last Judgement.

“This salt is created because, above all, when we sweat, we emit lactic acid, and unfortunately lactic acid reacts with the calcium carbonate present on the wall,” said Fabio Moresi, who’s heading the scientific research team handling the cleaning.

Scrubbing away at what Vatican Museums CEO Barbara Jatta calls a “cataract” sounds like it would be simple enough, if not for the fact that this one has accumulated on one of the most important and magnificent pieces of artwork humanity has ever produced.

Still, according to the Associated Press, who spoke with Jatta about the project, the method goes like this: “dip sheets of Japanese rice paper into distilled water and apply them to the fresco, and carefully wipe away the salt film.”

As a monolith, the average observer may not even notice the chalk-like coating that’s built up on the fresco during the 30 years since it was last cleaned. However, the parts of it that have already been treated provide a striking juxtaposition of vibrant, living color next to the areas that are yet to be restored.

The project is expected to be finished by the first week of April, ahead of both Palm Sunday and Easter Weekend.

A study published in Current Biology by the Sea Mammal Research Unit at the University of St. Andrews in Scotland analyzed two decades of humpback whale research data from New Caledonia in the South Pacific Ocean.

The team was interested in the long‑term implications of commercial whaling on mating habits, and how those habits have evolved in the decades since humanity agreed to stop hunting whales.

While the early post‑whaling years usually saw younger humpback males siring the most offspring, what’s clear today is that experience is what gets you a date with the whale prom queen—specifically, experience singing.

Humpbacks are known for their beautiful and wildly complex songs, but mastering the craft takes time and practice. The research team observed that as time went on, older males were siring more offspring than younger ones, with females appearing to become more selective in an environment that once endangered the species’ survival.

“As the population recovered, there were more older males than expected singing, escorting females, and successfully fathering calves compared to younger animals,” said senior author Dr. Ellen Garland.

Another odd one

This time we’re quizzin’ you on odd one out, musician edition, in today’s trivia.

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